In January, I was at mom's house when she received the phone call. It was time to select the date for Dad's internment at Arlington National Cemetery. Mom was so excited that the day was finally being decided upon. We chose July 22, got some further instructions and began calling Dad's family. His brother Jim would be there with his wife and my cousin Blaze who is in the Air Force Reserve full time. His sister Barbara and her husband, Edgar, would fly up from Florida and be there. We were all looking forward to honoring dad at Arlington for his 21 years of active duty service in the Air Force, retiring as a Lieutenant Colonel. Mom especially was very excited to see her husband get these honors. She knew there would be a space next to him when it was her time, and we began talking and planning for July 22.
Fast forward to April. Mom has been diagnosed with Cholangiocarcinoma and is being given 6 months to a year if she undergoes treatment. She made the strong decision to live out her life the way she wanted to and we knew she wouldn't make it more than a few months.
Patty, Mom and I had conversations and she was most upset about possibly missing Dad's ceremony at Arlington. The conversation continued, and I excused myself to call Arlington. The phone call went something like this..."My dad's ceremony is July 22, this is my mom's situation...what if....."
The kind person on the other end of the call explained the process to me and said that if there was enough time to get things in order, both of my parents could be laid to rest on the same day...if...
Well, May 6 came and mom passed away peacefully in her sleep and a week later, I called Arlington back. After a bit of paperwork and many emails, their "CASES" were linked and the unthinkable was going to happen on July 22. Patty and I would be saying goodbye to both of our parents on the same day, at the same time.
We celebrated Mom on May 20 and then began planning for July 22, a day we will never forget. It went from just Dad's family, and a small group, to including all of Mom's family and very close friends of mom and dad. We arranged for flowers at the graveside. We hired a photographer so that we could be present and still have memories to look at for years to come. We arranged private transportation to get everyone to Arlington, as many were flying in and there weren't enough cars. We spoke to the Air Force chaplain that would be leading the service in the chapel and at graveside. We had an "escort" from Arlington Cemetery that would guide us through all of the formalities before and on the day of. We learned about what it meant for dad to be receive "FULL HONORS," to include an Air Force Escort Platoon, an Air Force band, a bugler and a firing squad. Mom would have loved every minute of it and we know they were both watching and celebrating with all of us that were there.
Reflecting back on that day almost two weeks ago...it was sad, it was a celebration...and it was filled with love. Like any good family get together, there were moments of hilarity and moments of "You can't make this $--- up." We laughed (a lot), we cried, we hugged and we spent time together.
It was a tale of 4 families coming together to celebrate two people that meant the world to each and every person present. The West family (dad's side), the Knowlton family (mom's side), the Rahn family (Don's sisters, father and extended family that had gotten to know mom and dad as their own), and the Bernardo family (Ev's siblings and extended family that also had grown very close to mom and dad). Also included were very close friends that had grown up with mom and dad and been part of our "chosen family" for many, many years.
Not only did we share a day together, we have lifelong inside jokes that I am sure will resurface whenever we get together again. Though mom and dad weren't physically present for all of the togetherness and shenanigans over the three days, I know they were holding hands, watching and laughing right along with us. I know they would be proud of Patty and I. We did it!! We pulled together four different families and we celebrated our parents in a way that will never be forgotten!
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| The bus from Purcellville on the morning of July, 22 |
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| The other side of the bus, and our driver Manuel. Ask us about him someday!! |
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| Inside the chapel for the service before graveside. |
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| The military escort waiting after the chapel service to escort mom and dad to their gravesite. |
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| The bugler playing Taps, not a dry eye around |
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| Mom and Dad's 4 girls! Two daughters and two granddaughters |
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| The Wests and the Knowltons |
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| Dad's Family |
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| Mom's family |
As I said, it was more than just a time to honor dad. It was a time for togetherness and celebrating family!
We love you mom and dad!!!
